Mash bread and milk into paste in large bowl using fork. Mix in ground turkey, salt and pepper, using hands.
Heat oil in 12-inch skillet over medium-high heat, until shimmering. Add onions, chili powder, tomato paste, garlic, cumin, oregano and red pepper flakes and cook until vegetables are softened and lightly browned, 8 to 10 minutes.
Stir in turkey mixture and cook, breaking up any large pieces with a wooden spoon, until no longer pink, about 3 minutes.
Stir in tomato sauce, scraping up any browned bits; transfer to slow cooker.
Stir diced tomatoes with juice, beans, 3 tablespoons tequila, soy sauce, honey, and chipotles into the slow cooker. Cover and cook until turkey is tender, 4 to 6 hours, on Low.
Let chili settle for 5 minutes, then remove fat from surface using a large spoon.
Stir in remaining tablespoon tequila, lime zest, and lime juice.
Season with salt, pepper, tequila and lime juice to taste and serve.
Optional: garnish with diced avocado and sour cream.